It’s a Cultural Thing
Lately, there’s a lot of talk about cultural differences between groups.
In the Facebook group of expats (immigrants) people often use “it’s the culture” as an argument for accepting things that people don’t like.
This can make sense, for instance, if someone is having a party they might not invite people until a day or two beforehand. If you arrive at that party at the stated time, you often will be the only person there besides the hosts. If you try to leave the party at midnight or 1am you will be invited to have one more chela, just one more. After you drink that you will be invited to have one more chela just one more, after you drink that one….etc. And if you really do leave then, you are the early bird because the majority will be up till 4 or 5 in the morning, dancing, singing, and eating roasted meat that keeps getting put on the grill.
The funniest argument that I saw? People debating noise in Mexico. Everyone knows that Mexico is a place of loud parties, roosters crowing, and music playing. But now things have changed. As the country grows, rules are put in place in different parts of the country so that people can have a good nights sleep before their job. So an expat asked “how do you keep your neighbors from partying till 3am every morning” and many people jumped on the train of, “this is the way it is, it’s cultural, if you don’t like it leave the country,” etc. Then one guy responded, “Actually it’s not okay, there are rules in place, you should go to the police station and file a complaint.” to which an expat responded, “Hey, that’s the way it is here, if you don’t like it you should go back to your own country.” and the first guy retorted, “This is my country, I’m Mexican!” Which made me laugh. Why? Because this is the truth of life now. We are all so busy arguing about the way to be appropriate that we don’t allow people to just express something. I’m trying to think of the kernel of it but I can’t quite find it, I’m thinking, it’s all posturing, is the best way to describe it, none of it is grounded in any experience it’s all virtue signaling and when it’s not, when someone says something clumsy or awkward then the correcting and hand wringing reaches a peak.
I am guilty of using this, “it’s cultural” argument and have had Mexican friends correct me, “No it’s not cultural for a guy to have two girlfriends, he’s just a dick.” I’m not sure what culture is anymore, because it seems to me that it is an amorphous ever-changing idea about a place and people. And sometimes we get stuck in it, in a way that might not be useful.
People come to America looking for cowboys, but how many of us have ridden a horse? Do we eat hamburgers every day? Then why do we expect Mexicans to all sleep in hammocks and wear white embroidered shirts or dresses, or live in houses with dirt floors. Doesn’t mean some don’t, only that those are people living in a particular part of Mexico. Just like the cowboys are in rural parts of the US.
Lastly, some cultural things have lived out their time and need to die, and I’m talking the world over. Any cultural rule that subjugates another person or abuses them due to a perceived difference or weakness, can be torn from that culture and buried in the ground. Which circles back to the question; What is culture?
